I can’t believe the kids have been here almost 3 weeks. It has been a crazy few weeks. Between getting the kids ready for school and working through things, I am not even sure where the time has gone. I lost my voice for over a week and was sick for a couple days. Of course the days I was sick Jimmy was out of town for his daughter’s graduation. It was tough for a few days. By Friday night, I just cried. I felt horrible, I was feeling like a failure as a mom. The kids weren’t listening and had some issues with lying. Dealing with this on my own was hard. I had to really learn to lean on God and ask him for help. It was a tough week. I know not everyday is going to be hard and not everyday is going to be easy. The important thing is to learn to trust in God consistently.

The kids and Jimmy made my first Mother’s Day super special. They all picked something out they wanted to do. I got sneakers, a new Yeti, gift certificate for family photos and picture frames. They also took me to dinner. The cards they wrote made me cry and were so sweet. We had such a fun day together. 

The kids started school this past week. (Thank you Jesus) they were nervous about it, but they all did really well with it. Even though the morning was crazy. Jimmy woke J up to get him ready for school and he was covered in red paint. Jimmy at first thought it was blood, but then realized it was red paint. He had taken a bottle of red paint into bed with him. He got all over one of my blankets, which had to be thrown away. It got on his bedding a little bit. What we didn’t realize was how scared he was to go to school, so playing with paint was helping him calm down. We thought I wasn’t going to make it to school, but she saw her teacher outside her classroom and went running. She didn’t even seem to care when we left. She made a new bestie, a girl with the same hairstyle as her and had a rainbow skirt on. A on the other hand got sent to the Principal’s office the first day. Well not really, they put her in the wrong class. So we had to go to the office to get that sorted out. She was a trooper through it and made some friends. Jimmy and I volunteered for field day so we got to see the kids. Since we were volunteering for A’s class, we got to see her participate in a lot of the games. 

We had a conversation with the kids asking if they wanted us to call them son and daughter. A and J said we could call them son and daughter. I isn’t ready for us to call her daughter. A writes us notes that say I love you mom and dad, but she said she isn’t ready to say the words out loud. She does tell people that we are her mom and dad. J on the other hand has started calling us mom and dad and saying I love you mom and dad. He tells people that we are his mom and dad.The first time J called me mom, I just started crying.  This is the first time someone has called me mom and wow it really meant a lot and melted my heart. I isn’t ready to call us mom and dad. She doesn’t say mom and dad, she isn’t ready. I have heard her say to people that is my mommy over there and points to me. She is the one who says she misses her mom the most, however we have noticed it is usually when she is in trouble. This is something we are working through. We know the kids have a lot of things they need to work and we want them to have the chance to work through them.

Now that the kids are in school, I am trying to figure out my groove with work, cleaning and kids. I feel like all I am doing is playing catch up. I also want to get back to recipe creating and blogging. I really think I need to start with a list of things to do and prioritize everything. I think the first thing I need to start with is getting a good night’s sleep. Getting up at 5am is really taking a lot out of me. However  I feel like I am being more productive. Here is to a new week and getting things done. Oh and feel like I am organized. Right now I feel so disorganized and it is driving me crazy.

That’s the Dish from my Kitchen to your Kitchen ????

Billie-Jo